My 5 year old cousin was present at the funeral of a family member. In an attempt to clarify things she promptly asked her mother, "people die when that thing starts going beep beep right?". Aided by the numerous TV serials depicting death at a hospital, she seem to have quite simply understood death.
Its been a year and a half since my friend decided to bid farewell and I haven't yet been able to comprehend it. He seemed to have the best of everything and yet it wasn't enough. Some people who knew him towards the fag end think that was probably the best course his life could take for things would only get worse.
All sorts of emotions well up inside when I think of him ; what made him take that last step, what did his parents go through, was it because he was sick or was it him, what is his girlfriend going through, should i have sent that mail earlier,would dat make a difference, could we have done something , could we have helped him in someway , did we do something wrong, did we not do something .....all this even if I had just made contact after a two year hiatus.
What hurts even more is to watch helplessly from the sidewalk while some of my other friends clamber down the same winding road. You can only talk to people, it is totally upto them whether they want to hear you. But when it is the society that makes them do what they do, isn't there a chance to reverse it ? The whole of humanity can do nothing in its power to change a man's will. May be, will power doesn't always make you stronger.
How different is this from the non negotiable character of death ?
Sunday, October 01, 2006
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5 comments:
To each his own...
It's really difficult to know whether death is the solution to all of one's problems..the only people who can answer this aren't around to comment. :)But I do believe the spirit is eternal..maybe you'll get your answers in person someday..but I'm sure your friend is feeling very blessed right now to have come in touch with so many like you who still continue to care about him.
I do not know the exact nature of the event , but one thing I know . Even today's world , with all its cruelty and evil put together , does not justify ending one's own life .
May be I am being naive , may be there was sufficient reason ... but the reason , I believe in most cases , would seem sufficient only in that singular moment of insanity . It takes will to break away from that .
i have no words... it got me back to all those 12th standard memories... the last line is powerfull...
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